Gone, but not forgotten

Today, like any normal day, I checked my e-mail. There was one titled "You're unique 6-month-old: What will he do next?". This sent a whirlwind of emotions through me(I think my hormones are still out of whack, but it's still tough too). As some of you recall this time last year I had to deal with one of the biggest upsets in my life. With this e-mail I decided I'm going to take my blog back in time for a while. With that in mind....

It was the beginning of July 2006. Grandma had just recently been diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer. She had begun treatment and was an inspiration to all of us. The one wish she had was to see her great-grand kids. Carmon and I had been together for 6 years, married for almost 1. It may have been a little sooner than we wanted, but it was worth having babies early if it meant that much to my granny. I stopped taking my birth control and started having CRAZY cycles. I had been on bc since I was 17, so I had no idea what my periods would be like without it. Well, needless to say, "she" came for six weeks straight. Left, came back, left, came back. I never knew when she was gonna come. There was one point when I went 2 months without her- imagine my excitement. I was keeping EPT in business.

During this time Grandma's cancer had spread throughout her body and unfortunately she lost her battle with cancer, not seeing any of her great-grandchildren. She did get to see Matt's son via ultrasound.

Time passed and I could never get regular or two lines on that stick. I had been seeing Dr. J, as we'll call him, for quite some time now. He had always been good to me and I had no reason to change. After about 8 months of trying and irregular periods and pain I decided there may be something wrong. Dr. J did some tests and ultrasounds and we figured out what the problem was. It was his solution and answers to my questions that soon became my bigger problem. I'm ending here for tonight. My PRECIOUS cherub is sleeping and Mommy should be too!